Confusing Feelings

Submission......image by Gerome.
Submission……image by Gerome.

Her Name was Helen. She was the older lady I met at the book store. She was 52 years young. My mother was 41 years old.

Helen told me……….“I was once with a man who was……..how do I say this?……he was very Dominant…..he was loving but he was very sexual…..he demanded things from me that I had never done……I was embarrassed to do the things he asked of me…..but I did them…..he pushed me and instead of making me weaker…..he made me stronger.”

Helen looked at me for a bit and said……”This could be you……this is you.”

My understanding of this was becoming less confusing, but the pulling between where I had been and where I was leaning, was like bouncing off padded walls. It seemed my mind was screaming……”Please…..Please”….. and my body was electric with arousal. My cock was hard, swollen and throbbing as Helen spoke to me. I needed her to shut up. I needed something and I didn’t exactly know which way to turn, I only knew I needed release. There way an emptiness, coupled with a stronger urge to do something.  In the past when I would feel like this, frustrated and incapable of putting into words my thoughts, I would masturbate. Or, I would go to Sir’s house and submit to his desires. Without so much as a fleeting thought, “that” was not an option that crossed my mind . I was at the end of my rope. I felt as much as she was telling me to reach down and address my Dominant desires and energy, she was leading me. I was still being lead by a metaphoric collar and leash. I was beginning to hate that feeling.

It was too much to absorb. I looked at Helen and said, “I need to go.”

Rene was my best friend. He was my age, we had been sexual partners for as long as our cock’s got hard. When I got home I went next door to see him. He was home and alone. Rene hadn’t seen me in a while and Asked, “Where you been stranger?” We went and sat on his bed. “I don’t know, with Helen……that older lady,” I told him. He could sense I was troubled. “You been with Sir?” he asked. I shook my head. “Why not?” he quickly asked. I shrugged my shoulders, “I been into her……she makes me feel so different,” I replied as I laid back on his bed.

Rene was sitting aside me in his tight spandex shorts. He wore those even though he wasn’t a runner. He didn’t have a shirt on either, so his smooth hairless chest and hard little nipples were right there, teasing me. He curled up next to me and asked, “Has she replaced me?” he said, biting his lower lip. I saw an opportunity to tease him, something I never missed if I had the chance. “You’re such a sissy Rene…….look at you…..no top…..those slutty tight shorts…..and your clitty……are you wet?” I asked trying to humiliate him a little. I knew he loved it, it always made him wanna do anything I wanted.

I sat there for a minute and thought about what I just said, and how it made me feel. The more I teased him and humiliated him, the more willing he was to do anything I asked. Maybe I am that guy that Helen was talking about. With Rene it felt so natural, it was who he and I were for as long as I could remember. “The little sissy want to suck his Master’s cock……..I can tell?” I said, as I pondered why I referred to myself as his Master, I never used that word before. Rene looked at me with blushed cheeks as he opened my pants, not saying a word. He looked at me quickly as he lowered his lips and began kissing and licking the shaft of my cock. Then in one swoop he devoured me. I felt the head of my penis hit the back of his throat as he began bobbing up and down. I simply laid back and enjoyed his service to his “Master.”

I was close, so close. I needed to cum, but I wasn’t done yet. I wanted more from him. I wanted so bad to make him beg me to cum. He had done that a few times and now I needed it more than ever. “Stop…..Stop Rene…….look at me……you’re such a good cock sucker……I want you up on all fours…..and take those ridiculous shorts off,” I demanded. I really loved him in those shorts. I could see his cock outlined so perfectly. When he was dripping pre cum there was always a wet spot. But I didn’t want him to know it. They made me a little vulnerable, but that was something else I didn’t want him to recognize either.

Rene slipped his shorts off. His cock was hard and so aroused, the head a pale purple instead of it’s usual lighter pink. He went to stoke it and I said, “No…..no touching,”. I heard him sigh. Up on all fours he looked so feminine, with the exception of his shaved balls. Reaching out I grabbed his cock and pulled it towards me, “Now close your thighs and keep em’ tight.” His cock and balls were so cute and sexy, the thought of leaning in and taking each ball, one at a time in my mouth washed over me. Temptation, has not my best friend. I Slapped his ass hard to shake him and I back to reality. I heard him moan in his soft seductive way, begging for more. I swatted him again and then again, as his cock and balls twitched and bobbed. He was so incredibly sexy. My cock was the only cock to have ever cum in his hole and feel it clench. He was so tight, I needed lube. “Fuck it…..I’m taking you raw, I whispered. He moaned and said, “No……no….the head is gonna hurt.”

I agreed and stuck my finger into him. He moaned. Pulling out and pushing it back in all the way, in and out as I grabbed his cock. I began a thrusting my finger in and out as I stroking and squeezed his cock. Pre cum was dripping from the head as I milked him. I was rubbing against his spot, his prostate. His hard penis would be draining cum soon as he begged , “Please let me cum……Please!” I said nothing. I stopped stroking him, teasing him and he begged me again, “Please let me cum……Please!……Please.”

I wanted to see him cum, I wanted to feel his warm arousal wet my hand. I wanted so bad to take his cock and taste him. Then as I grabbed and squeezed him, I felt is cock pulse, and then release. My hand was drenched. I licked a bit off and wiped the rest on his pink hole. Grabbing his hip with one hand, I aimed my cock to where I would squirt my own cum and pushing into him. He tightened around me, his ass clenching as I pushed deeper. His pink little hole was stretched as I pulled out a bit and then back. A few more thrusts into him and my seed flooded his boy pussy. I had taken him. I had claimed him. Why didn’t I see it that way before.